I understand you’re very likely thinking, “But I like cauliflower. Even if I had, the awesome names of national dishes - toad in the holes, bubble and squeaks, spotted dicks, singing hinnies, jam roly-polys and doorstop sandwiches - would have more than compensated for any failures in the flavor department. I realize that British food has long been a punching bag for other supposedly superior world cuisines, but I found this to be anything but the case. This is a British dish, if the sharp cheddar, mustard powder, cayenne and charmed name didn’t give it away. How could it be anything but, when cauliflower florets are draped with a sharp cheddar cheese sauce spiked with mustard and a bit of cayenne and then baked in the oven until bronzed and, wait, what were we talking about again? My heart may or may not have stopped beating for a moment, though I’m sure it was love, not fibrillations.
The first time I saw it on a menu in the UK last fall, I thought a word was missing, perhaps “with” or “and.” I mean, you cannot make cheese out of cauliflower or vice-versa, or at least I hope not.* And then I tried it, bubbling and brown in a small ramekin aside my roast** at a tiny Inn in the middle of nowhere that looks like something you’d see in a Bridget Jones Diary (basically where I learned everything I knew about the UK before I got there, well, that and Morrissey songs) and I stopped talking.
I realize this dish may sound strange if you’ve never heard of it. Okay, well, maybe just the cauliflower is. What, you’ve never had cauliflower cheese before? Why, it’s right up there on the American Heart Association’s recommended diet, above the kale and below the oat bran.
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